First Dayz of School...

First Days of School-
 
Last month both Jaime and Anthony started back to school.  Jaime in Kindergarden and Anthony in High School and even though that stretch is such a large one that it is almost comical.  I found myself having a lot of anticipation for the both of them.
 
For my Kindergarden baby, I worried about the adjustment to a new school and new children.  I worried about the difference in the demographics of the children that she knew vs those at this school.  I even worried about the level of responsiblity that would be put on her at only 5.  I worried about her being able to carry her tray, open her milk, not spill, etc.  I worried about her speech hindering her from being able to select what she wanted to eat.  I worried about her speech not being where I had hoped that it would be upon her starting Kindergarden.  And, how long the school would take before they got her into In School Speeech Therapy.  I worried about having to pull her out of school for her Private Speech Therapy and what if any stigma would be attached to her for needing extra help.
 
I talked myself up and down my worries in the weeks leading up to her starting school.  And, the first day I went in late, so that I could go with her and even though I could feel  apprehension, which was in all honesty probably a direct reflection of my apprehension.  She did well, she was able to get over her fear and she didn't shed one tear.  That set my mind at ease.  I thought of her several times during that day because I wondered if I would get a call, how her day went etc.  I called her as soon as I knew the Nanny had picked her up from school, and she was soo happy and chatty and I was pleased.  Crisis Averted.
 
With my High Schooler.. I worried about the adjustment from big fish to little fish.  I worried about the AP classes that they put him in this year, and whether or not he was ready to step up to the plate.  I worried about his basic laziness, and wondered if this year he would stop procrastinating and start to use the study habits that he had been taught.  I wondered if he would come in to his own, enough for me to start giving him some real freedom and real responsibility.  I even thought about the fact during the next year he would be eligible for a work permit and a driving permit.. Scary Stuff..  He did ok on his first day too.. and is still finding his way on the other things..
 
I know that someone said that being a parent is allowing your heart to walk around outside your body, and that is soo true.  It is one of the scariest jobs that I have ever had.  There is not a day that goes by that I am not thinking of 1 or 3 of them through out every hour of every day.  I know that it is my hope and desire to grow up strong, well adjusted people who are strong enough to pursue their goals and reach them.  Thats a tall order.. but by the grace of God...